God's Right Here

Just like that my adventure to Australia has come to an end.. I can't believe that it has already been 7 month. I already miss my family in Australia but boy does it feel good to be sleeping in my own bed and not having to worry about captive portal every 15 mins... Sooooo you guys are probably wondering what has happened since I've been back home and I would love to tell you!

So I arrived back in Minnesota on May 3rd at about 10 PM and was greeted by my mother and father along with my cousin Charlie which was a great surprise and I had 2 more friends waiting for me back at home along with one of my dads friends. And obviously the questions started coming at me from left and right, but I was excited to tell them about my times and everything I had learned. So after a long discussion with my family and friends it was about 3 AM and I was about to go to bed when it hit me... I realized the very thing I told myself I wouldn't do I did right off the bat. I was preaching... And before I left one of the staff told me to just listen for 2 months and don't say anything, just live out the word. But the first opportunity I had I was preaching till my face turned blue trying to convince them that I'm right instead of showing them. So right then and there I was convicted and told myself I wasn't going to do that again. But obviously its easier said then done... 

A big thing that I would always joke about was that God wasn't outside of YWAM... But as I was boarding the plane to go home I realised that I believed that. I truly didn't know if God was in Minnesota, so I was getting nervous but yet excited. I had to completely trust God for the first time with everything.. With my friends, family, and with myself. So as I'm sitting in the plane Gods just getting me excited and reassuring me that he is there and that big things will happen when I get back. 

Lets fast forward to last night.

So last night one of my good friends invites me to a group meeting that I have never heard of but she said that they are very prophetic and its a great time, so I'm like awesome I'll be there. Then one of my friends who believes in God and grew up in a Catholic church but doesn't know much about The Holy Spirit and what he can do texts me and says hes coming home and wants to hang out tonight and I was like wellll I'm going to this church thing you should come! He texts me back and says I'll be there, but not till a little later. I was like awesome just come. I get there with my friend and I can tell that this is all about The Holy Spirit and that my friend was going to think that I'm crazy... so I'm praying for my friend who is coming that God would just touch him in some way where he would forget all the other stuff he saw! He gets here and right away he gives me a look like what did you get me into.. So after a 3 hour service the preacher starts getting words from God and after Prophesying over a few people he gets to my friend and tells him what his past looked like and where he could be with God if he decided to go after God full heartedly. After the service was over God told me he had a hurt left knee and he did, and after praying his reaction was hilarious because he was completely healed.

Thats just one of a ton of crazy things that have happened to some of my friends and family and I would go into detail but I know you guys would lose interest. So if you want to know the other things that have happened FB message me and I'd love to share them. But the reason I'm sharing this is because God is constantly trying to move through us and with us but nobody is letting him! If you want to experience God you're going to have to step out of your comfort zone and make sacrifices but I'm telling you guys it is so worth it. The amount I have grown in my relationship with God this past year is crazy and I would have never thought I would get to this point, and having a relationship with him out pours to other things that are so important in life! And the main thing I want you guys to understand is that you don't have to go all the way to Australia or Africa or anywhere! Because God is right where you are and he will meet you right where you are! All you have to do is give him the time and be willing for what he has! If you want to take steps to get to know him and don't know how message me and I'll help you! Just take that first step and everything else will follow! 

Doubts

Okay, so I know I have been posting a lot of blogs making it seem like a relationship with God is the easiest thing, and that's not the case at all.. Following God is easily the hardest thing that I have ever had to do.. I'm putting all my trust into something I can't see.. And almost everyone in the world would say that's one of the dumbest things you can do.. And there are times that I completely agree with the world. Some days I just sit and think about all that I'm giving up to follow a God I can't even prove is real but I have to trust my heart and his word... So with that my biggest struggle with God right now is believing he is a good God.. Which is a pretty big thing when you're having faith in a God that proclaims that's what is most important in a relationship with him..

I just can't wrap my head around the fact that a good God would create evil.. Before I thought it was so we could have free will. But when you think about it if we don't choose God then we will end up in hell.. So where's the free will in that? And am I suppose to feel bad that God sent his one and only son to forgive the sin that he created? To me it feels like we're just in this huge game and we're gods little toys.. With that, since we are always praying and waiting on Gods timing then what's the point in praying? If he's going to give it to us when he wants or show us when he wants then why pray..? Why continually beg a good God to do little things that he could do in a heart beat.. Like just heal every single one of my mosquito bites.. It makes absolutely no sense to me.. But I do know that these are things I'll never get to know until I'm in heaven.. And for now it's hard to be okay with it, but what other option do I have? I have lived without Christ and there is nothing worse than that life... It's a life where there is only depression and people looking for love in all the wrong places. This world is filled with people who are looking for only seconds of satisfaction and not thinking of the future, people who can't grasp the idea that it's going to be the same outcome if you make the same actions... I refuse to go back to a place of hopelessness where people have no clue what the true meaning of life or love is..

But as much as I'm struggling to believe that God is good I have faith that he will show me it. Because there is nothing more powerful than personal revelation. So instead of separating myself from God like most Christians do when they see that their relationship with God is hard or that they're not feeling his love, I'm going to pray that he shows me he's a good god. One of the biggest things I've learned since being here is the true meaning of love. We seem to think that love is a feeling but it's not.

It's something that we do.

Loving someone isn't going to be easy and the reason we have so many divorces these days is because the misunderstanding of what love is. So many people can't commit to anything because they aren't getting those feelings they got at the beginning and they didn't realize anything that's worth something you have to work for.. But the reason of this rant is to show you 3 things:

First, a relationship with God is hard just like any relationship, and it takes work.

Second, it's okay to have doubts and to ask questions! That's what we're suppose to do! If you're believing anything a Christian says then I don't know if you have your own relationship with God, and I'm really worried what your world view is like..

Third, understand the real meaning of commitment and love... Please.

Thank you for taking the time to read my rant!

The Heart of Adventure

I want you to ask yourself this question, what is the craziest thing you've done this month? And if you're answer has to do with a party that's not what I meant. I mean with adventure, where you actually went out and did something that made your heart skip a beat! Something where you had no idea what the outcome would be but you did it anyway because you wanted that rush. Even in the last 3 months!

Now, I want you to remember that rush, the feeling you felt!

For me that moment was going swimming with jellyfish that could kill you or make you extremely sick if you got touched by one. Also they were the size of your pinky nail so you couldn't even see them.. I know.. I'm BA.

But what if I told you that that's how we were created and designed! That we have been created for adventure and to go out exploring, not knowing what could come out of it. It says that we have been created in the image of God!

So my question is why aren't we more adventurous? If that feeling of adventure is what makes us happiest then why aren't we seeking it with all our hearts?! So many people just put their life on repeat. They just constantly do the same thing.. Wake up, go to class, work out, do homework and go to bed. (Maybe if you're feeling a little adventurous you'll do homework then work out) just waiting for the weekend where you can do what..? Get wasted make some bad decisions and just laugh it off and go on to the next day? Now I'm not saying school is bad! So don't get all upset about what I'm saying. If you're passion is to learn then who am I to say anything about it, but I am saying that if you're just going to school to get a degree that will make you the most money and get you the hottest wife or husband then you're missing the point of life.. And you're missing it by a mile! God put us on this earth to follow the passions in our heart! And I don't know about you guys but that's what I'm going to do.. I'm going to live out my purpose. And I'm hoping that each of you guys will too.. Even if you don't look to God first I don't care just do something crazy! Just do something that you will say WOW, I can't believe I just did that! And I bet through that you will see God, even if you're not looking. Don't go through life like everyone else just waiting for the next party or test! PLEASE! Life is worth so much more than that! Follow your passion! And when you find it share your passion with someone because that is true happiness and at the end of the day isn't that what we're all seeking?



We're all allowed one inspirational blog right?


Prayer request!

I leave for Peru in 1 week! So we need prayer for safe travels and team unity. Also that we keep our spirits positive and that we stay healthy the whole time. And that the insects and monkeys don't kill us in the jungle.. Thank you guys SO MUCH!


God bless!

HERE WE GO!

Hey everyone! I'm sorry I haven't been blogging as much as I should! But there's always something going on over here.. It's honestly crazy. But this past month has been a good one! My parents came out on December 16th and stayed till December 26th! While they were here we went to the Koala Cove where you get to hold a Koala and feed kangaroos! It was so amazing, but the fun didn't stop there. Then for Christmas we went up to Port Douglas where I got to go through the rainforest up there and saw all kinds of awesome animals! For Christmas we snorkeled the Great Barrier Reef which I guess you could say was a good time! But the best part of everything was by far being able to see my parents again! Even though my sister couldn't make it out and it wasn't the same without her, I still had such a blast with my parents!

So you're probably wondering what I've done that's productive and if you're not wondering I'm still going to tell you! Our outreach team held a fundraiser at our cafe to raise money for all the people who don't have enough money and it was such a success! We saw God show up in the amount we received!

As for my relationship with God.. Currently I'm in a dry spot and don't really know what I'm suppose to do. I haven't heard his voice in a while and it's been really frustrating this past month with just trying to grow closer to him. But through this time I'm really learning to be patient with God, and for those of you who truly know me, I hate waiting for anything.. I know I just have to trust Gods timing because he has the best timing. (Cheesy, but true)

The paragraphs above I typed at the beginning of the week before my Outreach in Airlie Beach and so I'll tell you how that was!

The first few days were the same as before with God where I was annoyed that I wasn't seeing God move in any of the areas I've been praying for, so I wasn't looking forward to the outreach. What we were doing here is for New Years Eve and New Years we set up a Chai Tent where kids from our school would play live music and we handed out free chai and just talk with whoever came in. The first night nothing really happened, except for a few good conversations with backpackers, and so I was getting even more discouraged in my faith and, was just praying out to God to just let me stay focused and give me strength for the rest of the week. The second night I spent pretty much the whole night talking to a guy named Linus, and he was so awesome! I was so amazed at the heart he had towards life and the way he saw it. He asked such good questions and the same kind of questions I had been asking the whole DTS, but instead of not knowing them God was using me to answer all of the questions and it was making so much sense.. The craziest part was that I knew that God spoke through people but I didn't ever think he would use myself to answer my questions. One of the biggest things I had been praying for, is that God would give me a heart for people, and that I could see them how He sees them, and right after our conversation I just got overcame by something and it shot through my whole body and I started crying. It was the weirdest feeling I've ever felt. But all I wanted to do was tell him how much he was loved.

It's crazy how much desire I have for God now and how much I want to get to know him and have a real relationship with him just from that conversation. He's completely changing my life and the way I see it. I know that it's easy to be passionate for God after you see him move so the real challenge will be if I can continue to be passionate for God even though I don't have the feelings!


If you are wondering how you can be praying for me, here are some points:

-to have revelations on revelations on revelations! I learned that you don't truly know that God is a healer unless you've experience it, same for his love and his faithfulness. And so I'm waiting for my own experiences so I can truly mean it when I tell people those things about him!
-our outreach team still needs a good amount of money so if you could pray for that to come in that would be amazing!
-  Unity in our Peru group! We are going to be tested so much while we're gone and we won't be able to have a successful time over there unless we work as a team with God!


And lastly guys, I would like to leave you with this! It's okay to really struggle with your relationship with God.. It's not going to be rainbows and butterflies 24/7.. We get so caught up in worldly things sometimes that it's impossible to always be super on fire for God! But the way you're going to get closer to him is by asking the tough questions.. The questions that nobody can answer except for him! Ask for revelations because when he gives you them then you know that it wasn't coincidence but it was our father in heaven who cares so much for us! And I can promise you there's no greater feeling than being close to the God who created us!
 Keep striving to get closer to Him and if you ever need prayer send it my way! I'd love to help you in your journey with God! I love you all so much who are taking the time to read this.. Seriously it means the world to me and I can't wait to come home and see you all! God bless!

Life Lessons

Hey all my Minnesotans! How's the weather?? Bitterly cold did you say..? Wow that must be awful! How's the weather here? Oh you know 85 degrees and sunny everyday! One day it was raining and got to 60 though.. That sucked. So if you could pray for sun everyday that would be much appreciated!

I know what you guys are thinking, this kids got jokes! But anywayyyyyy things here are awesome! Here's a quick update on the past few weeks!!
So a few weeks ago we went to Byron Bay and watched over a bunch of schoolies (which is pretty much a bunch of drunk senior spring breakers..) and what we would do was:
-Pass out these Red Frogs, (which is candy)
-Make sure the kids are safe
-We made them pancakes for free in the morning
-And walk them home if they got too drunk

It was a very interesting week! We got assigned in groups of 4 and in each group there was a guy and a leader! We had a really random group and none of us talked much before the week but we all got along tremendously and made quite an impact on the week! Our group was one of the more energetic and fun of the groups, so there was never a dull moment!

This week was honestly the turning point to my DTS because I realized what was blocking my relationship with God so much and it's the fact that I had the wrong perspective on life. I thought that if things didn't go the way as I saw them then life sucks. Which is an awful outlook on life, especially when you're life is based on an unpredictable God. So god really gave me a wake up call to always complaining about the littlest things that didn't go my way and through that God's done so much more through me!
We can look at all the little negative things that are going on in our lives and always live with a cloud above our heads... OR we can look at all the little positive things that are going on and be the light in this cloudy world!

I don't think we realize how much effect we have on the people around us... If you're not building people up and helping them strive to be the best person they can be and live up to their potential then you shouldn't be in their lives. I know it sounds brutal, but God didn't create mankind to just sit and destroy each other's confidence... He created us to love each other unconditionally and to sharpen each other! That's what's been on my heart the past few weeks!

We also did a 24 hour worship, which is where you worship for 24 hours straight! (Pretty self explanatory) And that's when God revealed everything he's been doing in my life the past 2 months! It was mind blowing!

Lastly, I truly appreciate all the support you guys are giving me back home and even here! I would not have been able to get where I am today without all you! So if you're reading this I love you a great amount, and If you ever have any questions.. PLEASE MESSAGE ME! I'd love to talk about it! Now I shall leave you with this verse!!! 

"So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." 2 Corinthians 4:18 

First Month

Sorry for such a delayed blog, but we have been soooo busy and to be completely honest I have no idea where to begin! I've typed up 2 different blogs before this one then just deleted them the next day because its been such an emotional roller coaster! So I will try to explain this past month to the best of my abilities! HERE WE GO!

THE PEOPLE

The first week was an interesting one.. Having to remember so many new names and faces, getting use to a new schedule in a new environment is a unique feeling! Luckily the people that I have in my school are AMAZING! Every single one of them are the most awesome people you could imagine! We all bring our own unique personality from a completely different part of the world! As cheesy as it sounds we are just one big happy family, that are held together by an awesome group of people which we call THE STAFF! These unreal people help us stay positive and not kill each other.. They are so relatable and so trustworthy that it makes it so much easier to tell them honestly where you're at! Which helps a lot when you're not at a place of peace. 

God and I
My relationship with God has been like a roller coaster.. One second I'm understanding and loving what god has for me then the next one I'm thinking how easy it would be to just get on a plane and go home.. But yet I'm still here because I know how good God truly is! I've learned soooo much while I've been here and at times it's hard to really get all of it but I know God will reveal the stuff to me when it's most important! But here are some of things that have effected me the most since I've been here! I hope they help you and your journey with God!
The first thing I learned that really effected my time here was to lead by faith not by feelings! If you really think about that it's what we all do! If you're life is good or if your life is bad then it's how you treat God.. And that's not how it should be at all! If we truly had faith in God then we would love god no matter what season we are going through, and the sooner you realize that the easier your walk with God will be! Trust me I found that out the hard way!

Another thing I've learned is that it's okay to ask questions and wrestle with things people say about God! I actually thing that it's SO much better for your faith! If you just believe everything someone else says about God then you wont get to experience you're own relationship with God! We have all been created in such a unique and beautiful way! So why have the same relationship with God as everyone else..? Since I've been here I've questioned so many things that Gods done and people have been saying, because I don't want to be one of those fake Christians that just agrees with anything anyone says! Also God loves when we ask questions because then we give him a chance to show us how good he truly is! So ask the tuff questions and have faith that he will move and I promise you will see an amazing thing happen in your life! It did for me!

Something awesome that God has done is he has given me dreams!!! I've been praying since I got here that god would give me dreams because that's the best way I can connect with him and when we were out evangelizing one night one of our leaders randomly said I feel gods saying he wants to give you dreams and I was like wait what... Because I literally didn't tell anyone that. So that was nuts! And I've been having dreams since, how awesome is that?? SO AWESOME!

Lastly, we had a week called hearing Gods voice! Which in this week as you could guess we were trying to hear Gods voice! Our speaker was a guy named Jason who's on our base, at the beginning of that week I was thinking about going home because this was not what I was expecting it to be.. Jason didn't know it but at the time there was a lot of pressure on him.. But as you know since I'm still here he killed it! He was so relatable and just a true man of God! He would tell stories after stories that would be exactly what I needed to hear, he wasn't sugar coating it either. He was being completely honest and upfront about who God is and what a walk with him would look like! Through him I realized that gods not going to do everything as how you want it to happen! Which took me a while to be okay with.. I would keep going back to this one question:
Why would this all powerful god not just show me it this one way? If he's so big and so good, why would the just do it this way?
And the answer is because a true relationship with God isn't about how we want it.. If you think about a relationship with your best friend if they just wanted it their way the whole time would you stick around in the relationship? Or would you leave and think that person is selfish? That's what our relationship is like with God if you think about it! We just ask for it in our way and if we don't get it then we say god doesn't get our love.. How dumb is that? Just ask for a true relationship with him and stop being so selfish with it and I promise you will get what you ask for! It's going to be hard and a long process but SOOOOOOOOOOOOO worth it!



Adventures
You're probably wondering about something's I've done in Australia and the things I've seen!

2 weeks ago I went to the Sunshine Coast and saw Kenzie Rhodes! For those of you who don't know who Kenzie is she's this really awesome girl that I went to high school with and is also doing YWAM in Australia!

Brisbane is known for their city so we go to the city once a week at least and they have street performers and a Ferris wheel and crazy awesome shops!

Most recently we've been going up into the mountains that are just 30 mins out from our base that are seriously crazy! It's the most crazy drive ever and we saw a baby kangaroo! (Awhhhhh)

Next weekend we leave for Byron Bay, which we will be doing schoolies! It's like our senior spring break where everyone gets trashed and we go and make sure nobody gets hurt and make them pancakes! That'll be interesting!

The Flight

I never thought I would be blogging one day, but I also never thought I would be flying to Australia for 6 months and 3 weeks! I feel it would make sense that my first blog would be about my trip out!
The emotions that I have are ridiculous. One second I'm excited and pumped to see what god has waiting for me on the other side of this flight! Then, I realize that I just left everything that I knew and was once comfortable with to see what god has waiting for me.. I was scared. So as I'm sitting on the flight going back and forth between the emotions I have, I decided to listen to a podcast. The podcast is called "This is Love" and it was talking about if we have perfect love we would be fearless, because love conquers all, and god is love! (1 John 4:18, 19) that's when I realized that I'm going to Australia to really understand the power of God's love! The next time I'm on a plane I know that I'm going to have a completely different relationship with god! I thought I was so strong in my faith and I wasn't going to learn much.. But I now know I have much to learn.. I can't wait to see how god uses me these next 3 months and I hope you guys follow along! Thanks for reading!